Dad

Not a single day goes by that I don't think about and miss my dad. Thirteen years ago on March 11 he passed away, for me March 11 is always a very emotional day.

My dad was truly one of a kind. He was smart and witty, unassuming and funny. He was the perfect match for my mom, and the greatest dad a girl could have. I remember countless hours in our basement with him playing Annie with my little sister and me. He was always Sandy the dog, and he gave the best performance panting and barking away. We would sing and dance around him as he sat there playing dog. He also loved to turn music on and dance around with us. Our favorite game was "run around daddy". I think he played this one on nights he was tired, he would lie on the floor and we would run around him. From time to time he would grab us and tickle us until we had tears running down our faces. Every night after a long day at work I remember him asking my mom what he could do to help, she usually replied, "play with the kids," and that's what he did.

My mom used to make me go to his supreme court cases when we lived in Virginia. I remember thinking they were terribly boring, but how happy I am now that she made us go. I have memories of my dad arguing important cases at the United States Supreme Court, and from time to time even making the Justices laugh. He could always make people laugh. They called him Huck Finn in a morning coat, he was always just a small town boy at heart.

My dad got cancer for the first time when I was in sixth grade. My parents went to Maryland for what they thought would be a few weeks of treatments, but ended up staying for almost five months. During this time my dad argued another case at the supreme court with a wig on his head, oxygen tank on hand, and a nurse close by. My mom would read his briefs to him sitting on the foot of his hospital bead. Many times she thought he had fallen asleep and would stop reading. As soon as she would stop he would tell her to go back to paragraph five second sentence over and re read that part. His body was failing him, but his mind was as sharp as ever. We knew our prayers had been answered when my dad's cancer went into remission, the doctors didn't think he would make it. We feel lucky that we had an extra 8 years with him. Heavenly Father still had more for him to do on this earth.

Not long after his remission, my dad was asked to be the President of BYU. For the remainder of his life BYU was his passion, he still argued a few cases, and did a little work for his law firm, but for the most part he was committed to BYU. It became a family affair, all of us spending time going to various BYU sporting events and activities. My parents were extremely involved traveling, hosting visitors, giving devotionals and participating in all BYU events. My dad stepped down as President just 2 1/2 months before he passed away.

My dad expected a lot of his kids, and we hated to disappoint him. In our family we always knew the two most important things were the Gospel and school. He was always ready to help us with school in any way he could. We all knew not going to college was not an option, and though sometimes I didn't want to finish, I am grateful to him for setting that expectation and for making it possible.

Though it breaks my heart that my dad was never here to be a part of my kids lives, I am grateful he got to know Brett. My dad and Brett's dad went to Boy's State together as small town Arizona high school students, lived in the dorms together, and double dated together. After their missions and getting married our parents lived in the same apartment building in Chicago while my dad was in Law School and Brett's dad was getting his PhD in economics. My mom cried the first time Brett came over to the house, he looked just like his mother, her good friend Louise, who had passed away about 10 years before I met Brett. Every time Brett was over my dad would yell from wherever he was in the house, "who invited Larry Wimmer over?" Brett and his dad do sound just alike. When we would all get together our dad's acted like kids, talking about girls they dated, things they used to do. We loved it. My dad loved Brett, and though I was young he told me he knew Brett was the right one for me. He told me it was the person who mattered, not the age. It means a lot to me to know how much my dad loved Brett.

On March 11, 1996, all seven children and my mom stood around his hospital bed as he passed from this life to the next. We all took a turn telling him what we loved the most about him, and then he left us. The pain of that day is different, but still present today. It is not as sharp, but just as painful. I think often of all the things my kids are missing by not having him here, of how different our lives are because he is not here to be a part of them. I didn't have kids yet when he died, and he was such a fun grandpa to the ones who were here. It saddens me to know my kids will never get to know his humor, his love, and that he doesn't know me as a mom. I like to think he gets to look in every now and then. Every time right before I have a baby I turn to Brett and ask him if his mom and my dad are saying their goodbyes, I believe they are.

I miss my dad every day. I miss him for the grandpa my kids will never know on this earth, I miss him for my mom, I miss him for by siblings, and I miss him for myself. He gave me my love for roller coasters, good food, ice cream, laughing, BYU and running. He loved my mom more than anything in the world, and taught me by example how to be a good spouse and parent. I am grateful I had such a wonderful Dad, I only wish we could have kept him around longer, but those things aren't up to us. I love you Dad!